
While talking with a friend on the phone I looked out the back window and saw a big, fat porcupine in my garden.
"What are you eating?" was my first thought. (In a previous post I wrote about the porcupine mowing down my winter lettuce crop.) "You better not be going after my elderberry."
Later in the phone conversation I made another check on the porcupine. It had moved a little--not very far--and appeared to be in the middle of my carrot bed. "Maybe the porcupine is trying to tell me that I need to dig these carrots up before the voles get them." (Third thought).
After the call ended I thought I had better make sure the porcupine had not started munching the carrots in advance of the voles. I didn't know what exactly I might do about that. Ten of my apple grafts are within waddling distance of the carrot bed and if I were a porcupine I would be seriously considering munching some of the fragrant apple bark. (I don't have my vole guards on the apples yet either.)
The porcupine was sitting in the aisle between the raised beds with its head butted up, chin tucked in, against the row of carrots. It appeared to be asleep. It was asleep. I watched it breath for awhile.
I was curious as to how fast a sleeping porcupine breathes. I watched its guard hairs rise and fall and quiver with the breaths. The porcupine's
pelage is quite complex. Long delicate hairs rose above the thick fur and quivered in the breeze. Perhaps they warn sleeping porcupines of close contacts with undetected predators and allow the porcupine to react before fangs reach the surface of its skin.
The soft hair of the sleeping porcupineA porcupine has 30,000 quills and countless more hairs of other types. At any rate it is said that they never experience cold and the hollow quills make them excellent swimmers.
I was jealous of the porcupine. It must be nice to be able to fall asleep anywhere, anytime and not be cold. (I am always cold and sleep under a pile of comforters most of the year.) And to not be afraid of anyone bothering you. Most animals are exceedingly vigilant.
A friend of mine spent forty nights, in mid-winter, sleeping under the branches of a hemlock a half-mile down the road from her house. She had spotted a porcupine sleeping high in the tree and wanted to see if it ever came down. For at least forty days and nights it did not.
At that point her children were threatening to leave and her husband to divorce her and she gave up her investigation.
The porcupine spent its days chewing bark from the slender upper branches of the hemlock. It relocated itself regularly when it exhausted the supply of fresh bark within reach. The porcupine ate and slept in the tree for over a month. It clung to the high branches of the hemlock, doing whatever porcupines do, through snow storms, wind storms and ice storms. The few sunny days when the warmth of the winter sun reflected from the snow must have been very comforting.
With their few personal needs so easily met one might ask what porcupines do with all of their free time. Personally I think that they ponder the question of the origin of the universe. Some version of "String Theory" I believe is the latest happening thing on that topic.
I think this is why porcupines move so slowly and sleep so much. They have been working on this for a long time and it's exhausting. There you are munching winter lettuce in Dan's garden, equations spinning around in your head and, suddenly, it is just to much. You press your aching forehead up against the bed of carrots and fall asleep amid the delicate fronds of carrot leaves.
I recently met a kitten who explores strings--those loose threads hanging from your sweaters for instance. But she is too quick in
temperament--in and out of the topic in a flash. Then she moves on to attack a sock worn by someone who is trying to enjoy a cup of coffee and a bagel. Not in it for the long haul. It is all in the moment for kittens. They are an amusing diversion but they will never advance the theory of the universe very much.
Porcupines on the other hand, I believe spend much time deep in thought--it takes time to think--and it's hard to converse with one. Their thoughts develop slowly and there are long pauses in which not much happens in the way of a conversation. They have lots of time, so why not go about the job deliberately? We modern humans who are busy and
overcaffeinated can have a hard time with this kind of relationship. You have to be the kind of person who will sleep for forty nights under a hemlock tree in winter to get very far in a relationship with a porcupine. Mostly we are mildly amused for a moment and then move on.
I think the theoretical conclusions of porcupines have been developed over generations. Kind of like Stonehenge where scientists figure it must have taken many generations of disciplined astronomical observation to lay out the rock formations that accurately mark the passing of a year. And we think of these people from perhaps a hundred generations ago as primitive.
I have found porcupine dens under the ledges of local ridge-tops. From the size of the piles of the dry, aromatic porcupine droppings it appears that countless
millenia of porcupines have inhabited these dens. The scent of the porcupine den is very pleasant and soothing. Sometimes I locate the dens by their smell as I am walking in the woods. For all know the generations of porcupines leave the results of their
ponderings painted in musk on the walls of their caves for other porcupines to read. Much of this, alas, is lost on us.
But here I am by the carrot patch asking questions of a porcupine and, so far, getting no answers. The porcupine woke with a start. It must have picked up somehow on all the neural activity going on a few feet away from it.
Porcupine wakes with a start.It turned and faced me.
The deep impenetrable gaze of the porcupineIt said nothing. No response to any of my questions. I was able to read no answer in its dark eyes shrouded in soft dark hair. Was it an air of annoyance? I think so.
I am not generally comfortable when a wild animal stares at me, especially close up. I think humans have spent at least as much time as possible prey as they have as predators and we still have that response imprinted in us that gazelles and zebras have when the lion wakes from her nap and begins to scan the
savanna for lunch offerings.
I began to talk to the porcupine again "What are you thinking?" I offered warily. It turned its head back to the carrot bed and I think let go a sigh of disgust.
I decided to move away and let the porcupine go back to whatever it had been doing before I disturbed it. It didn't seem to be eating my carrots, just enjoying them.
However it didn't seem to enjoy my passing behind it. It raised its guard hairs and exposed some very nasty looking quills. All of a sudden it did not look so warm and fuzzy. The message was getting clearer.
Porcupine on alert
Still on alertI turned to get one more photo and it started walking toward me.
Porcupine on a mission; but what mission?I don't like it when wild animals walk toward me. "What are you doing? I asked. I got no answer, it just kept coming.
I do what I usually do--I slowly backed away, trying to show no fear.
Porcupines have no time for petty human concerns. It turned before it got to me and passed under the door to the horse shed.
What does it take to get a nap around this place?I believe that it muttered "Insufferable humans!" as it entered my shed but I am not sure. Like most humans I can be so defensive.
I guess we are on a moment to moment, live and let live basis for now--the porcupine and I.
I will deal with the carrots and get the vole (or, possibly, porcupine) guards on my young apple trees soon.
If it starts climbing the older apple trees and feasting on their bark we will have to another, more serious, conversation and I am really not looking forward to that one. When you come right down to it, despite my occasional warm and fuzzy appearance, I can be at least as intransigent as a porcupine.